As those butterflies danced around in my stomach while he kissed my neck I took his face into both my hands looked at him and kissed him as if I’d never see him again. I instantly got wetter just from the passionate way he kissed back.
Everything suddenly stopped though, the room was completely silent and all we could hear was the rapid beating of our hearts. We jolted back into reality almost like nothing ever happened. We began to talk and laugh again
My phone rang from across the room and as I spoke to the other person on the line I feel his soft hands run down the length of my arms and his soft lips brush across my neck. There goes that jolt again was the first thing that popped into my mind, the second was the fact that I was still on the phone.
He’s making my body heat up and my heart race again and all I could think was “shut up and hang up!” He began to pull my panties down now the person on the phone is only a mumble in my ear I’m not to sure of what they’re saying at this point.
He pins my hands under his above my head and slowly penetrates but not without a struggle considering he was not an average size. As I go to gasp I faintly hear “okay by talk to you later, beep beep beep” as my phone hangs up.
He’s no longer gentle he grips my hips and thrust every chocolate inch of him in me and I yell out in pure pleasure. He bends me over my panties still aground my ankles as I hear him breathing heavy he slaps my ass and another scream of pleasure escapes my lips.
As I’m bent over I feel my juices run down my legs the world has disappeared, the room went dark, everything went silent, except us his moans fuel mine and as I thrust back trying to match his speed I feel my ass jiggle and hear clap as he fucks me like he’s releasing every emotion he’s ever felt for me and couldn’t express.
It’s over as quick as it started were finished but we’re not finished neither of us came. I beat his chest as he laughs and tells me “you’ll get the full effect, I have our next time planned out to be special”
At first I’m angry and disappointed until I realized everything else was a tease to lead up to this and everything else will be a tease to lead up to that. And every moment I will anticipate the day we fuck the shit out of each other!
It started off so innocent just a quick glance with a flash of his pearly white teeth as I blushed at the fact that his eyes sparkled every time he glanced at me. There was this undeniable connection and denying it would be like denying the jolt of electricity that would flow through your body if you were to get hit with a taser.
I tried to deny every feeling that jolted through every vein in my body as he stared into my soul with those beautiful brown eyes. I invited him in, part of me hoping things would escalate part of me hoping he’d be just as shy as I would and we’d get no further than a cuddle. My mind was saying don’t do it but my body screamed don’t let him leave without getting fucked.
I was comfortable with my friend I walked around in my panties and enjoyed his company in the comfort of my own home. We laughed talked and while I stood between his legs talking to him as he sat on the edge of my bed, my body acted before my mind could process and I laid him back on my bed and straddled his lap.
My mind went black from there because all I can remember is his hands gripping my ass as I stared into those eyes and felt that jolt again. I bit his bottom lip and slowly he slipped his tongue past mine, he tasted like mint gum, I began to breathe heavy, the butterflies began to flap their wings rapidly while dancing around it my stomach.
I’m missing you so much, and yet I can’t bring myself to call your phone or even type those words to tell you. It’s not only you I miss. I miss who I was when I was with you, when we weren’t hurting each other.
I miss the laughing, the hugging, the cuddling and even though I do those things now it will never have the same feeling as when I did those things with you! See you abandoned me, left me lost and alone with no sense of who I even was anymore without you. You left but you miss me and now you expect me to come running back to you because you had the courage to admit it.
I miss you with everything in me but I’m not brave enough to risk losing myself again or losing everything I gained when I learned to let you go. You were once my world and loving you was all I wanted to do. Now I miss you but refuse to go back to you.
I miss your smile, running my fingers through your hair, and hearing your laugh. I miss the way you would lay your head on my lap and talk until you drifted off to sleep. I miss the brush of your soft skin against mine every time we touched. I miss the look in those big brown eyes as they would sparkle and your pupils get big as you tell me you love me.
I miss just hearing you say my name and the feeling I’d get in the pit of my stomach as my heart raced hearing your voice dance across my eardrums so seductively knowing it could only be you saying my name so sweetly!
I miss you, but I’ll never tell you.
She’s emotionally deprived of everything he once offered, deprived of the dreams he once sold to her. Things changed and she’s not sure how to get it back to the way it used to be. She’s deprived of attention, romance, and intellectual conversations but he doesn’t seem to notice or doesn’t seem to care. Which one it is she’s not sure.
She wants to feel loved again, has a burning desire to want to feel that passion when they make love. She’s bored and has no clue how to fix it because everything she says it’s like he hears but doesn’t listen.
She’s screaming for attention but he’s in his own world. She’s lusting for men that aren’t him because they give the attention he refuses to give. She knows he’s tired and trying but only trying in all the wrong places and she’s pleading, screaming. And begging for him to notice that she’s slowly starving soon she will be nothing, a fight to make it work will no longer be made.
He’s there but he’s not it’s like she’s laying next to an empty vessel of the man she once knew and she hasn’t got a clue of how to bring him back. Her love is far from gone but her interest is close to nothing, her sexual drive no longer exist, and her intellect is only shown in the dialect she has with other men.
They peak her curiosity, showed her with conversations other than empty complements. They seems genuinely interested in her ambitions, her thought, her interest. She knows they are no better than him they’ll deprive her of everything she wants as well as soon as they get what they want, but for now she takes what she can get while she can.
She’s deprived of everything he once offered and is unsure if she will ever get it back again.
His hands roam and my body shivers his eyes never leave mine, so how could he know all the right places?
The softness of his lips against my neck, the rhythm of his body against mine. His hands against my bare skin hot and filled with passion. Cold sheets wrapped around my leg.
His stroaks filled with so much passion, so wild tears stream down my face. Moans filled with such pleasure dying to last longer.
In an instant everything’s gone! It was all a dream that only he could fulfill. Soon they’ll come true just me and him.
I have the biggest confession to make to myself and although I already knew I chose to convince myself I didn’t. I told myself there’s no possible way I could know the answer to my own toughest questions.
I told myself I was confused, I still am and yet I know the answer, one I knew the whole time and yet the last answer I expected to confess to myself. See I’m confused because while I kiss you I think of him and when I think of him my heart swells and my legs get a little weak under the weight of my heavy heart.
While I’m with you I think of him but when I’m with him I think of you. I think of how your heart would break if you really knew where mine was I think of how our future would shatter if you knew where I longed to be. I convinced myself the grass is greener all while knowing I knew better!
My biggest confession is knowing I could do no better than you, it could get no better than what I have now. My biggest confession was realizing you deserved better and I knew that so I convinced myself it would be your loss when the whole time I knew it would be mine.
The grass is far from greener on the other side he is far from the man you could ever be, but I convinced myself he’s what I deserve because I could never be special enough for you.
My biggest self confession is admitting I was looking for something new and never thought the hurt I caused you. I’m selfish and now that I confessed to myself it’s time to confess to you.
Scared of the past, scared of who will find out and throw it back in her face. The images never go away, the tears never stop, and the fear never ends. Scared the future could bare the same thing whose going to help her then?
The familiarity of his voice, the distant smell of him, unfamiliar with his touching, thinking she may know but she can’t be sure.
Scared of a single touch from a male it’s all to real. The jolt of a single touch her heart beat quickens, fear starts to show and she feels the pain all over again. She scared but she can’t be sure of who.